First 4 Phases of Mom & Baby Life

Monday, 24 April 2017




1. Newborn: The Craziness

Your life not only changes completely but you feel like you have been thrown into another reality, space and time frame where everything is new to you and you don't even know how to walk in it.
You go from sleeping as a human being to non sleeping at all, from peeing twice an hour to peeing once a day, from having a huge belly with a baby inside to having a huge belly without a baby inside, from doing things with two hands to never have even one hand free to hold a cup of tea, from putting yourself first to putting a tiny little crying stranger first (because yes, even being your own blood you don't really know him/her yet), from being physically heavy but kind of ok to being in constant pain because of the delivery. The exhaustion, the confusion, the hormones: it's just a mess, a crazy mess.
Note: as crazy as it is, it's normal!! You are not alone and no matter how, you are doing great


2. Baby: Continuous Adjustments

Either you are breastfeeding or bottle feeding, at this point you are finally quite confident and you know what to do about that; changing nappies is sorted now and you could do it with your eyes closed, you start of kind of understanding what your baby likes and doesn't like, and your baby is more awake and more alert by the day which gives you something to enjoy, but: immunisations, teething, growth spurts, inexplicable and impossible-to-understand random crying, your baby is growing incredibly quickly and going through a lot in no time: it s like s/he is an Olympic runner and you are just an amateur trying to follow and trying to adjust your tactics to not stay too behind. It s a constant switching between achievements and satisfaction to stress and frustration.
Note: don't worry, you are not failing anything, you are just learning along with your baby, be proud!

3. Major Changes 

Baby is now smiling and discovering new abilities like being able to grab and move arms and feet, s/he is more aware of everything around, giving you much clearer signs of what s/he wants or does't like! S/he is discovering new prospective thanks to being able to hold the head up autonomously, sitting up alone and trying solid foods, maybe crawling, for sure being very curious and wanting to touch everything and put it in the mouth. Mom becomes a policewoman cleaning after a hungry curious little trouble maker, a whole new world has just started. You are still climbing but you can see a bit of the landscape and it's just beautiful!
Note: this is fun, don't worry about the mess, it's tiring but it's fun, share your baby's wonder and joy discovering the world, enjoy it!

4. Breathing Again

Baby is sleeping through the night most of the nights, has favourite foods and favourite activities and you know them, is interacting and understanding a lot, is saying some actual words, the interactions is so heart filling now, and on the other hand you feel like you are kind of back to yourself and having real fun, not as tired as before, maybe you even have a bit of time for yourself and your interests/hobbies, you are finally breathing again!!
Note: take time to appreciate how lucky you are and how far you ve gone!

Can you relate? We would love to hear your comments! 

*I did not include the length of each phase and the months they correspond to on purpose, because every baby is different! No need to compare who eats solids first, who walks first, who speak first, we all get there but at our own pace so no pressure on you nor your baby! 

What You Want to Know About Breast Feeding

Thursday, 20 April 2017



What I knew about breastfeeding before my baby was born was what I was told at the antenatal class: 'It will be hard for about 6 weeks and then it will be OK, it is the best for your baby.' That's all! As you can imagine, I was nowhere near being ready!

The important thing I knew was that I wanted to breastfeed because I thought it was the most natural thing to do - which it is, but is it also something we need to learn , like walking, we are not born knowing how to walk but we are born to be walking eventually! We need to learn and practice and fall down and get back up to eventually be able to walk! Nobody told me that breastfeeding is the same!

I have been breastfeeding my baby for 12 months and this is what I know now:


  • Breastfeeding for the first few months means being there - always, constantly, without a break, even if you need to pee, even if it's been days that you don't sleep - one of the biggest commitments you could sign up for!


  • It means being hungry and thirsty like you could eat a lion and drink a river every time your baby is feeding - well, think about it - your body is producing some magical liquid full of whatever is needed to make a human being develop in all their aspects!!


  • It means being in pain. Massive pain at the beginning, to the point of crying because it hurts so bad, and the only thing that can make it slightly better is being in the hot shower for as long as you can so to get a little gentle massage.
    *if your pain persists please speak to your midwife or health visitor, or seek support in a breastfeeding support group, they are really helpful

  • It means sitting kind of comfortably or lying down but feeling like you are running a marathon, so tired that you think breastfeeding should be considered an Olympic sport!

BUT

  • When the pain is over (YES, it will be over, it won’t last forever!) You WILL get to the point of having no pain AT ALL! For me it was completely over by the third month (I wish it was only 6 weeks!)


  • When your body has adjusted to the new workload and you can get on with eating 'normal meals' & doing 'normal things' - if you are so lucky that your baby lets you eat 'normal meals'!


  • When you don't feel exhausted literally all the time (sure you’ll still be tired but not like those first weeks) 

THEN

  • Breastfeeding is the most incredible cuddle!

  • It is one of the best, heart-warming and powerful gift to you can give to your baby - and receive from your baby!

  • It is what makes you proud the most as you in your entirety with your body are literally giving life to your baby every day (and night, of course!)


  • It is feeling special and needed and unique



If you are thinking about breastfeeding or you have just started, remember to give yourself and your baby time to learn; read about it, join groups and ask for help!! Try not give up, it is normal to feel frustrated, exhausted and in need of support because it is not easy, but it really is wonderful!


New Mum - The Ultimate Cocktail of Emotions

Tuesday, 4 April 2017

                                   

Becoming a mum changes so much in your life that you are likely to feel there is almost nothing left of you previous life or even your previous self! Especially during the first few months, and at least until your baby's first birthday, you face continuous challenges and incredibly new and overwhelming feelings that are probably impossible to understand if you don't go through them. This of course shakes up all your relationships and your own point of view towards some people in your life, for example:


  • your own mum becomes a hero and you seriously think that grandmas should be classified as super heros!! they had to take care of many children, to make bread and food with their hands every day with a lot less resources, they had to manually wash the clothes and clean without magical tools like vaccum cleners or products like dettol, and of course learn everything themselves withour asking Dr. Google… really how did they do all that?!?

  • your best friends (without children) who used to understand you completely and in a blink of an eye, now have absolutely no idea of what you are going through and you can see in their eyes that all your efforts to explain are unfortunately unsuccessful

  • stranger mums with babies at the park automatically become your new best friends and before you realise you are talking with them about your most private experiences like giving birth and going to the toilet with your baby - because you have noone to look after him/her but you really need to go!

  • your feelings towards your partner become the ones of a schizophrenic person: at points you just want to kill him and break up with him and never see him again, at points he is your best friend and you love him more than ever and those feelings can change back and forth in no time!


What I know now about motherhood is that it’s a real cocktail of new and intense emotions and events that shake up everything in your life and everything that you think you knew about life, and I am so glad I have the chance to experience it!


Tell us about your relationships pre and after baby!
How crazy is how much they can change?!
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